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What Made You Feel Good Today


Ralph Wiggum

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  • Manual mode ________________________ All day, erryday
  • Donating Members
  • Member For: 16y 4m 4d
  • Gender: Male
  • Location: Probably above atmospheric pressure

My reply. Might see how outlandish I can get before I stop getting new messages.

That's fabulous! Yeah I don't really have time to message anyone. I'm too busy tending the vegie garden and fruit trees out the back and drenching the sheep. Plus sometimes the sheep get into the fruit orchard and eat all the berries off the mulberry trees. You've got no idea how hard is is to get out the purple sheep poop stains from my suede carpeting when I forget to take off my shoes before I come inside.

Unfortunately I don't have much of a family history, I was raised by priests in a rectory in the Kalamunda hills. They made bread by hand and sold it at the weekend markets to pay for maintenance of their dwelling. It's where my love of cooking started, and look at me now! Suede carpets and acres of my own mulberries.

Sometimes there are so many leftover mulberries that I lay down a big long black tarp on the hill and cover it in overly ripe mulberries, then slide down it naked like a slip and slide. I like to think of it as getting back to nature, I wind up all purple of course, even my head! It's a funny sight in the mirror. But who doesn't love the sight of a fierce purple headed beast from time to time, am I right or am I right!

Anyway the rectory was a grim existence at times for a young boy but hard work is like food for the soul. You shouldn't work too hard though or it makes your soul get fat, like urban pigeons. Disgusting birds, positively dripping in avian mites. Like rats with wings.

Edited by -Stever-
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  • Manual mode ________________________ All day, erryday
  • Donating Members
  • Member For: 16y 4m 4d
  • Gender: Male
  • Location: Probably above atmospheric pressure

Man so many copy and paste responses keep coming, ignoring my purple headed monster joke FFS, I'm insulted. You're right, I'm bored now so time to change gears.

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  • WOT?
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  • Member For: 11y 1m 3d
  • Gender: Male
  • Location: Frankston, 3199

I really don't want to discuss my family with someone I just met.......

Imagine how long the email would have been if she did want to open up

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