stubbietubbie

Fuck it.

Make your own k31th meditations!

At least they'll have their immune system built up. Seen too many kids get really badly sick later on in life from basic things because their parents kept them in a hermetically sealed bubble early on. Edit: everything in moderation, though. Not saying they should play ooky mouth.

Okay, another night, another literal piss-take. I honestly hate my review now. It's sloppy, erroneous, and pandering. I said I should've checked it three times; what I really meant was the famously misquoted but-still-relevant "write drunk, edit sober." F*ck, what a mess. lrn2write, me.

OHHHH now I get it because both are places worth having a sh*t.

I... ...what?!

I've said it before and I'll say it again: you haven't spent enough time in Tasmania if you haven't played bumper cars with the local wildlife.

I always forget, you're here, working on the forum, for nothing. Sounds like my life.

I thought you blokes were on holiday? WiFi is too good these days.

Dem's fightin' words. Go banana yourself!

...yo.

That implies that his Honda is worth stealing! (VTEC just kicked me in the chest)

Guys better go to Subway and have a eating race.

Bonus points for saying "should have" instead of "should of."

Pics of missus for compensation. Also winning 12th supp doesn't count, you know that.

AHH DIK DIK OVERLOAD (NOT WHAT I ASKED FOR BUT I CAN STILL FAP TO THIS)

Your review of my review leaves mine in tatters. Bravo. I cannot compete with your mastery of the English expression. How can a pissed me pick more errors than a slightly-less pissed me could on that review before hitting 'Post?' There's a least three mistakes. I guess I really do need to do that third sweep before publishing. Learn and live. Or not. Plus my reviews aren't a fine wine or a fine novella, while time doesn't ruin those, it does for this.

Nice, lads (and unseen ladettes). PICS!

Anything to cool the place down! (I hate summer, even if I'm more outside than ever with mowing and bike rides huehuehue). Thanks for the pre-emptive like, I hope I deliver. <3

Going to Port Arthur? CBF checking the itinerary but it's a good way to spend a day, fascinating history, buildings, and just a lovely place.

Shameless plug

I swear I saw The Joker drive that in Suicide Squad.

The Grand Tour - S01E01 Nearly a year-and-a-half since the 'fracas' to end all fracas (fracarses? I dunno) terminated Jeremy Clarkson's association with the BBC wunderkind Top Gear series - one he was associated with before the reboot and then headed the charge in it's very successful reboot, funnily - he's back and bought his mates/not-mates Richard Hammond and James May. Not only that, but long-time friend and master producer Andy Wilman and a slew of former Top Gear production crew are in tow too; meaning this new show, Amazon Prime's The Grand Tour, is probably more close to the Top Gear many know and love than it's third iteration which scorned the ire of motoring entertainment fans/critics around the globe. Now, firstly, we in the useless country of Australia aren't officially getting this until sometime-December, since while Amazon were prepared to plough some $250 million-plus into three 12 episode seasons of what is version 2.0 of what was the world's most watched show, they neglected to prepare for demand in key markets that have supported this brash, bumbling trio of journos from the start, I.e. us. So for now, the cheapest, quickest option is to torrent the sh*t outta this before we give them a chance to recoup that massive investment (but really, I'm not paying for Prime, in any form or price anyway), and if you're not getting at least a 1080p version, you're wasting your time. Technically filmed in 4K, you'd really like to have that option, and I'm sure some will when that is available here, but for us desmonds who live in the sticks, the streaming speeds are literally impossible, even if your TV is capable (unless a 2160p torrent pops up, hopefully). And while I'm sure 4K will be stunning viewing, you're not going to be too envious running at HD ressie. Next, this is as much an aural experience as a visual one, so please make sure you have some decent speakers to drench yourself in the high-revs of some of the best car engines being taken to their ragged edge, and an eclectic mix of popular tunes helps a lot too. Anyway! To the actual show itself. From the off, The Grand Tour knows it has a lot of nervous, long-time Top Gear fans looking to it to deliver a familiar, tried-and-true experience that the latest season of Top Gear tried and ultimately failed to deliver(despite the excellent but corporately-stifled efforts of Chris Harris and Rory Reid - honest, give them a chance, they'll be perfect in a year or two, even Matt LeBlanc isn't bad; though he's feels more scripted than the aforementioned). I'll try to keep the comparisons to a minimum, but it's hard when the very first episode of this highly-anticipated series throws direct reference to Clarkson's removal of Top Gear for it's intentionally overblown, but almost-nostalgic opening sequence. After a battle of television lawyers, we now know what The Grand Tour can and cannot use to the same effect they had on Top Gear. Unsurprisingly, The Stig is gone, and that's probably this shows greatest loss, even if it was a creation of Clarkson, Wilman and co. They got it right in the first place: a racecar driver is very good at driving a car, but delivering smart, engaging dialogue on a car is beyond their capabilities. Running unknown-to-most-outside-the-US NASCAR driver Mike Skinner as their not-tame racing driver, we see his face, his fat gut, and a tryhard attempt at making him crude because apparently the US producers insisted the test driver be American. Which is fine, but he's no blank avatar, despite Clarkson and Skinner trying to giving him the persona of stereotypically racist and rough (who knows, he might actually be, but it felt very heavy-handed regardless). That said, the new test track, which actually has a funny name considering it's branded after a deadly virus - albeit to emphasise the potential hazards of a track with wildlife, an active power plant, a little old lady's house, and "moisture," to name a few, will take a while for hardened fans to get used to after the famous Dunsfold track, complete with bespoke corners (though we wonder if anyone beside Michael Gambon will ever get to rename the "Your Name Here's" sweeping, drift-friendly pinhead of this technical track. No stars in a possibly-not-reasonably-priced-car-considering-the-budget this week though, since (SPOILERS) it's more fun to have them die. The BBC somehow made sure we can't call the news the news any more, so now it's intentionally cringe-worthy titled (so all segments have new names to try and pass-off this restriction), and hopefully it develops into something more akin to what fans were familiar with, but it still managed a few laughs. So we've got news segments, stars in cars segments, and track time segments, so what of the 'films?' Well they've there too, and the first episode made sure it opened with a doozy, the long-awaited McLaren P1 vs. Porsche 918 vs. "The Ferrari The Ferrari," and it's a gorgeous example of the filmic quality we can expect in the next three months that rivals any Hollywood blockbuster can punch out - and without overblown special effects to boot. Gone is the name-change bet promised in Top Gear days, since that's in the past, but an equally big wager is placed regarding the anticipated throw-down of these three hybrid hypercar giants, even if we have to wonder if an up-to-date Tesla P100D could monster the lot in an electric-powered-only drag race. The familiar series of mostly one-sided challenges is back, as is the name-calling and superior clash of personalities that feels oh-so much more natural, unscripted, and honest than anything Top Gear can now muster (even if I suspect this is just a matter of years of conditioning, getting to know the characters, and just very solid acting/writing). This is why we're here, and Clarkson, Hammond, and May haven't lost an ounce of the chemistry that makes them such a joy to watch. Fans can and will pick apart the parts of The Grand Tour that do and don't work, but I optimistically feel this'll get honed quickly over time, and we'll equally quickly become more accustomed to what the lads can do after giving so much of their famous content to now-rivals who understandably don't want anything trivial like "Oh cock" said (you'll pick the moment when you know May would've otherwise said it) or "Back to the studio!" (maybe they intentionally tried to differentiate themselves from Top Gear there) - opting to "Back to the tent!" because that's the new home of The Grand Tour: a free-roaming studio to go anywhere in the globe, and they make a big point of it, from the changing background vistas to the culturally different audience, it's a very smart departure from the fixed, abandoned hangar of old and gives a greater appreciation of audience participation that was once only restricted to the now-defunct Cool Wall and random shout-outs. Overall, this is a very solid opener, and the teaser of things to come only whets the appetite. We know there'll be many non-car segments - they even admit it - but it's just as much about the camaraderie as the vehicular experience, and they know that. We're here first and foremost for the three contrasting hosts, who've lost none of their rivalry, childish pranks, or ignorance to common sense, and if that was lost, the show itself would be lost too. The cars - gorgeous or powerful or absurd as they are are only a foil to work off, and that's why The Grand Tour works - man can make machines like cars, but machines can never make something as odd, as funny, as varied as man. Bless.

Not likely to ever move at all.

Hopefully the depression hits tipping point one day.